Be aware of the police

What if when you’re casually strolling on your scooter somewhere in Asia, minding your own business with the thousand other drivers beside you, when a policeman stops you.

Rule number one: Do not stop. Keep on driving, and they will not follow you (hopefully and most likely).

However, if you for some reason do stop, try to get away with whatever horrible things you’ve done (driving without a helmet, not having your license with you, a broken light, didn’t wave when turning…) with as much bribing needed for you to get off paying as little as possible.

– Keep your money somewhere else than your wallet. You can always pull the “I have no money, sir”-card, and give them whatever small money you have. Maybe you just spent all your money on lunch, or you’re coming from the beach where you didn’t want to carry any.
– You don’t have your passport because it’s either at the immigration office for your visa extension (which is actually true for me), or you keep it at the hostel safe so that no one can steal it from you.
– You DO have an international license (khrm), but you forgot to take it with you.
– “Please sir, I do not have 500,000 I only got 1000,000. Seriously.”
– Don’t talk to them, give the money and get away with it. Too much talk makes them angry.

If they take your bike key, make them give it back to you. If possible and you dare, drive away.

That’s what’s up today! I was not the one driving, btw. And I WILL stay off the main roads when I do.

One in a million. Indonesian traffic picture from the interweb.
One in a million. Indonesian traffic picture from the interweb.